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Chi McBride Quotes (Page 2)

Emerson: You ain’t lying. The only way you’re lying is if she asks the question, (imitates Chuck) “Hey, did you kill my father when you brought your mother back, which I didn’t know about because you never told me?” (normal voice) Don’t tell her.
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Emerson: Death by scratch-'n'-sniff. What the hell happened to people shooting each other with guns?
  • Rating: 4.3 / 5.0Permalink
Emerson: Your book was a bomb.
Napoleon: Who are you to criticize my life's work?!
Emerson: Your book was a bomb. It exploded.
  • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0Permalink
Chuck: Oh! Then I’ll be polite and say, "Oh, I’m sorry I forgot my purse and I’ve got no pockets".
Emerson: Uh huh… well, hey somebody see, now I’m gonna need to see some ID on the count that you look just like that dead girl that got herself killed on that tropical cruise.
Ned: Okay, if that happens I'll say something like "What is this? A police state?" (pause) If I ever say that it means I'm having a panic attack.
  • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0Permalink
Emerson: "Someone in love is like a gangsta. They be like, 'Oh baby, you bleeding. How did that happen?' while they're hiding the razor in their weave."
  • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0Permalink
Chuck: Four wives? That's just greedy!
Olive: And intriguing.
Emerson: Some people like vanilla, some like chocolate, others like their Neapolitan.
Ned: I like Neapolitan.
Emerson: Then you'd do well as a polygamist: one woman to have, one woman to hold.
Ned: Why? Why would you do that? For the record I'd make a horrible polygamist. I'm easily distracted, I wouldn't know where to focus..
  • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0Permalink
Ned: I had a sexy dream about Olive last night and I'm sure it was influenced by a reality-based kiss. By the road. You know...
Emerson: There is no way for this conversation to be anything but awkward for me.
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Emerson: They were all breeders too.
Olive: They make dogs for their polygamy cult?
Emerson: Dog breeders.
Olive: They make dogs for their polygamy cult?
Emerson: Ain’t nobody making nothing for their polygamy cult.
  • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0Permalink
Emerson: I suppose I could pay my bills with blind kids' smiles. But their money is a lot easier.
  • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0Permalink
Emerson: That girl dropped a bomb in your sub-conscious with her saliva.
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Total Quotes: 60
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    Ned: You don't have to do this, Madeleine. Please put the gun and the bat down. Or definitely the gun.

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