Olive: Yesterday, a ferrier named Lucas Shoemaker was found dead. Trampled.Emerson: Why should I care about a dude that sells fur coats?
Olive: Not a furrier, a ferrier. Heir.
Emerson: Fair-rier?
Olive: It's a blacksmith. Puts shoes on horses.
Emerson: Don't try to act like that's a word everybody knows.
• Episode: Girth • Rating: 9.6 / 10 • Permalink
Emerson: What did you compete about?
Olive: Promise you won't laugh?
Emerson: No.
Olive: I used to be a professional horse jockey.
Emerson: Hahahaha! (mimics riding a horse) Hahahaha!
• Episode: Girth • Rating: 8.0 / 10 • Permalink
Olive: Sweet Secretariat
• Episode: Girth • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Chuck: (about John Joseph Jacobs) What if he changes when his blood sugar drops?
Olive Like a hypoglycemic werewolf!
• Episode: Girth • Rating: 9.3 / 10 • Permalink
Emerson: You can't die of evilness.
Chuck: Happens all the time you do something mean or hurtful to someone like tell a secret... Bang! You're dead.
Olive: Or Bang! You're not really dead you're just pretending to be dead while other people who think you're dead are heartbroken.
Emerson: Or Bang! You talk too much and you both go wait in the car
• Episode: Girth • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Olive: Tell Ned I love... his pies.
• Episode: Girth • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Olive: Maybe John Joseph faked his death. People do that all the time.
Emerson: No, they don't.
• Episode: Girth • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Olive: What was that rhyme? I scream, you scream, we all scream because you faked your death!
• Episode: Girth • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Olive: Ned hates Halloween, you know. Makes him moodier than a pumpkin full of PMS.
• Episode: Girth • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Olive: I'm sure it's just the mailman. Or a windmill-to-windmill salesman.
• Episode: Pigeon • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 39
